The Pencil Test

Do I dare even admit to the fact I did this??? But I found it and what girl in their right mind could ever resist the temptation??? Granted...I knew exactly how it would turn out long before I ever tried it...but still...I was a glutton for punishment and, well, yep....I did it. And this is strictly a girly thing cause no man in their right mind is ever going to understand this...or probably even care. But girls do....pretty much all girls do. Why we do it , who knows...standing in front of the bathroom mirror looking like a complete and total idiot as you become subject to every crazy idea out there.

So, I found the pencil test on the Brazilian Butt website. Despite the 289 times I fought the urge to go do this I finally caved and just did it. And, well.....the results??? Not only could I stick one pencil in the butt overhang...I got about 3. How's that for making life real??? Ok..so it was really only one. I tried 2 but the 2nd one kept falling out. Strangely, I was somewhat comforted by that. I found it a bit odd that instead of being devastated that the pencil was wedged so firmly it took a crowbar to get it out I was instead alarmingly comforted that it would not entertain a 2nd pencil with the 1st. There's always a silver lining to every cloud, now isn't there??? But, yep. It stuck and it stuck well.

In the meantime, I am feeling so exceedingly much better....finally!!!.....I took off with the hard and heavy rugged workout routine once more. Pushups, squats, the Wii's My Fitness Coach and I also began running regularly again. I've been running off and on throughout it all but, I must admit, it has not been anywhere close to consistent. This last week I began to crave it all again....a good sign! Instead of the dread that has been there before running, or really any physical exertion at all, and actually continued to exist the entire duration of any activity, there was an excitement for it all....a longing for it. And when the pain began to kick in I welcomed it. Something about it all makes one feel alive and reminds one that there is life and blood pumping furiously throughout the body. It is a feeling of health, the familiar feeling of power, determination, and strength....that I can do anything....accomplish anything I set my mind to. The competitive nature within being entirely fulfilled..instead of feeling tired, run down, nauseated and overcome with life. It makes me feel alive again. It's so much more than just a matter of staying within a weight range, assuring that a pencil never sticks in your butt crease again, fitting in a pair of jeans or trying to get rid of any bulge beneath the back of your bra or developing arms worthy of showing off a tattoo. It's about life and health and being alive in every way. The sore legs, arms, chest and back were welcomed with open arms. I remembered once more what it is to feel good in a deliciously miserable sort of way.

So, let the fun begin. Let the muscles grow and the bones gain density and build strength. Bring the pain...it means the body lives and moves and is put to use in every good way. What comfort there is in staying active. It brings clarity of thought, purpose, motivation and energy to each day. It is enough to make me feel better both in mind and spirit and improve self image so that I am a more enjoyable person in general....both to my husband, to my children and to those around me. When you feel better about yourself it just affects every aspect of life. And I'm feeling pretty good. There is a joy that motion of the body and activity brings. It doesn't help that I think I was severely deficient in Vitamin D and sun rays absorption. So, I've sold lemonade with the children in the heat of the day, talked to town neighbors, jumped on the trampoline, laid out there barefooted while sweet Ivye girl takes her first tentative jumps of the many years of jumping ahead of her. What life there is in being outside and soaking up sun, playing with children, running, jumping, doing calf raises on railroad ties and sprinting down the length of the driveway in races that end up in a pile of laughter on prickly green grass....that inevitably results in sneezing for hours on end. Yes, I definitely think a healthy dose of vitamin D and some exercise does the body good.

In the meantime...I "failed" the pencil test and hopefully the increased activity will lift the butt, as the website promises, and unstick the pencil that is permanently wedged at the moment.