Learning Random Kindness and Beautiful Love

He stands there...holding KB Home sign in cold winds. He huddles behind huge 5 ft piece of obnoxious yellow cardboard as a windbreak. All to make a little money. Who knows his story....why he's there, what made him take the job. He looks miserable. Absolutely pathetically miserable. Children see him too. Different voices all reiterate same thought. "Mom? Why doesn't he just go home?" I answer, "Well, he's working. That's his job. He needs the money." A chorus of quiet, "Oh's" follow. We drive on. And once again my own heart thoughts are confirmed in their young voices. "Can we help him?" A discussion follows concerning how to help the 20ish year old boy that stood cold and miserable in the wind. We'd passed him earlier that day....hours before. And we passed him again....still there. I remember the months and months we went without an income...without any hope of an income. All that we came here for vanishing in wind like vapor. Desperate for any work jobless husband could acquire. Through massive outpouring of random kindness and beautiful love from others...we were given the ability to make it. Supernaturally provided for in every way.

"Let us touch the dying, the poor, the lonely and the unwanted according to the graces we have received and let us not be ashamed or slow to do the humble work."

Mother Teresa

Who knows this boy's story. How many people have driven by this day and not even seen him? Oblivious to the yellow tilted sign, the frame of a person huddled behind it? How many people were so self absorbed they gave this boy no heed at all...did not even, in fact, notice that he existed? And how many saw him and kept driving...laughing cynically and quietly thinking, "Poor bastard"? This world....it's an awful, evil, self centered place. Every man for his own. Whatever happened to just caring for fellow mankind? What happened to random kindness and beautiful love? Just a soul reaching out to another beautiful soul? What difference does it make if he's straight or gay, atheist or Catholic, what ethnicity he is, pro life or pro choice? When did the world get so political, so arrogant, so egotistical, so self absorbed, so self centered, that we lost all kindness for another human being...that we no longer even see them...or even worse...we see them and keep going? And what are we teaching our children when we do? Raising a generation that is also oblivious to the plight of mankind, the soul of another human being? We don't know them. We don't know their story. We don't know why they're there. When did the world get so mean? Every man for himself? When did we stop caring about anyone else but ourself and our convenience?

So we u-turn. Quick trip in store to purchase a sub sandwich, a bottle of water and a Hershey's. Down the road a little we stop at gas station and purchase a large .89 hot chocolate. Total...maybe 5.00. We return to huddled boy-man behind huge sign. Children watch excitedly through window to see kindness in action, love made tangible. I hop out quickly, oldest by my side, and I speak"We've seen you out here all day, passing you several times. It's cold and you look tired and windblown. Here's a little kindness and something to cheer your day up!"

I seriously thought the dude was gonna cry. He thanked us profusely, his smile stretching ear to ear. I handed sack of food and hot drink over. We drove away as he sipped slowly and rummaged through food. Children giggling excitedly, "Mom! I don't think he ever quit smiling. I think we made him happy!!"Necks craned backwards straining to see last glimpses before he disappeared behind hill, "He's STILL smiling!!!" I smile and feel it intensely, this God given feeling He programmed into all mankind, It is forever and always more blessed to give than to receive. Our children feel it too, they experience it first hand.

Man camped on corner, wife holding baby, perfect in every way, sleeping soundly...oblivious to the world around him and the gravity of life, cradled in arms of attentive mother, father desperately trying to gather anything he can to make ends meet. Who knows why they are there...what circumstances put them on that corner, where they came from or where they will go. Husband of mine digs out all we have, children gather all money in pockets, dollar bills to silver and gold change...and we give. WHO are we to judge???Who are we to sit there and arrogantly say "Go get a job!" or just drive on in self absorbed world? We have been there. We have been that family totally reliant on a God that does not fail. We have been that family given to in every way...that man that could not get a job anywhere....yet qualified with over 15 years of experience in a renowned profession. How can we just drive on totally oblivious to another human being when we, by nature, are just as needy. Who are we to judge the needs of another? A father desperate yet being judged by those that possess the "American dream" because they, after all, worked for it and earned their way in the world. Why and how did we become such a critical nation? What people never give themselves a chance to realize.....the joy comes in the giving...for you can never help another human soul without also helping your own.

I see in my children this blank slate....this inner God given desire to do good...to change the world. Innocence untouched. The knowledge they have the power to change people and do good...to encourage, to lift up, to serve, to give. Because even at these early ages young spirits know that all of own life is made better when bettering others. Deeply embedded by a God that pours abundantly and gives abundantly. May our children know what it is to do good and to desire that which encourages, lifts up and raises the heart of another human being.

"The good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and the evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks (and actions come)."

Luke 6:45

May we learn intimately and our children learn with us, what it is to be kind and to notice humanity. The man child huddled in wind behind yellow cardboard sign. He has dreams. He has a vision. It  may only take one act of kindness, someone to notice him, to give him the courage to pursue what lies within his heart. Big, red, costumed Angry Bird man on corner holding advertisement. He has a dream...and I doubt being an Angry Bird advertisement was it. Devoted father, loving mother, holding baby on street corner, sign reading, "Out of work. Please help. We need food and a job." What is his dream? More importantly, what is his story? How can we just be kind...love tangibly....give without judgement..without expectation of anything in return. Just give to help those like we have been helped...because it feels good....because it's the right thing to do. For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks....words of life or words that tear down and destroy. Out of the abundance of the heart actions come....actions that give life or actions that take it away.

Food pantry. Once a month. Children eagerly anticipate, from oldest down to 5 year old helper boy. Because spirit innately recognizes early in life what it is to help another....to raise up and not tear down. They laugh and talk to those who come. They glow the child joy that bubbles within.....mere act of random kindness experienced at any age.

We mull this over...family conversation over clanging of forks meeting plates, spaghetti filled mouths...round table discussion of what it means to be kind....the very essence of kindness. Not only to those in shared space but to a much bigger broader world. Kindness....it starts within the walls of home....to each other. But sometimes...when the beautiful ugly of all that life entails...day in, day out, with each other, frustrations, clashing personalities, the very dirty essence of life gets in the way and we all lose sight. Perhaps it just takes looking beyond, opportunity to give of self. And in the giving we all come back changed with renewed respect, changed perspective, and appreciative love for all that call this thing life. We purpose over empty plates to add random kindness and senseless beauty to each day. To look for opportunities within these walls, to give to each other, but to look with eyes wide open for opportunities that exist beyond our small 1 acre confines. Each child challenged to look for opportunity as we experience this world and come into contact with all of humanity...all the possible souls we can touch, lives we can change in a day, tiny kindness to touch another in some small way. To learn to see beauty in all the ugly. To learn to see the world around us...to open the eyes of our own soul.

As a family we have decided to train our eyes to see the need, learn to look for opportunities, see beyond all of self. Exciting game to children. We run errands, live in needy, broken, hurting world, we train ourselves to observe with attentive heart, act in tangible ways. Kindness. Love. It pours from the overflow of the heart.

What better way to give to our children than to teach them what it is to give? For in giving they receive. A lifetime of contentment, fulfillment, joy, learning to see beyond self, think beyond self. Our mission as a family...no less than one tangible act of kindness once a day. One act of random kindness to each person in home and no less than one as a family to the world outside our doors. Such joy has entirely proven contagious. Happy hearts overflow.  I challenge you...not only give to your local food pantry but donate yourself also. Dedicate a school day or take off work early once a month to see the faces of where your money, your donations of food go. If you can't afford to donate food, money....just donate the very gift of yourself. See the faces you help. Hug them, touch them, talk to them. Look around you and truly see the soul behind the body.

"Let us not be satisfied with just giving money. Money is not enough, money can be got, but they need your hearts to love them. So, spread your love everywhere you go."

Mother Teresa

Take note of the man on the street corner holding a sign. Remember to say thank you and teach your children to say thank you to the man or woman dressed in fatigues. For they are the reason you are still free. Teach your children to hold the door open for others....to see beyond self. Buy a bottle of water for the Angry Bird man, hot and dressed in an even hotter costume. Find a local missionary to support....one in which you  believe in their calling, their mission in life...whether it be caring for orphans or providing medical care. May own own eyes be opened and those of our children's. Heart change. Spirit eyes, sensitive as they learn to truly see. Take our challenge with us and do no less than one random act of kindness daily until the end of the year. That's 63 days of giving, retraining mind, teaching eyes to see beyond the mundane, peripheral spirit vision in tune to the plight of all humanity ...to see the value rather than the bother.

May we learn to be the beautiful. For within us lies the power to change a life. And it is in  giving that we receive. May our children learn this truth intimately at early ages. Kindness. It's a contagious, joyous thing. In the end, only kindness matters.

"The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep abiding, loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen." 

Elizabeth Ros

Oh that I would learn to be the beautiful. That our children will grow into beautiful people that see life for what it really is. It's just not about them. May they grow into people that are not only full of integrity, character, honor, and humility, but of kindness, compassion, gentleness, quiet strength, patient with others and overwhelmingly joyful. May I learn to see with love and act in kindness so that they may follow by example. My heart overflows.

"Go out into the world today and love the people you meet. Let your presence light new light in the hearts of people." Mother Teresa