Disturbing Happenings in Cyberworld

I'm still trying to decide whether I'm just ultra sensitive due to having never anticipated making my personal thoughts so entirely public or whether I have just cause to be extremely careful in monitoring visitors to such a personal endeavor for me. But there are some crazy sickos out there in the ever elusive cyberworld of computers and faceless people.

I put my little counter on the bottom of my page in an effort to monitor who comes and goes from the blog to ensure some realm of safety. It tracks personal data information of visitors coming and going. It also tracks keywords if my blog was found by a search engine and what keyword/s led them here. So, it's usually something odd I'll never in my life understand people searching the internet for. One time it was "Big Haircut" another time it was "Golden Rule". I'm still not exactly sure how that one led them here. But, as of a few days ago the search words "Spanking Spoon Kids" directed them here. I thought it was more than odd as I wondered who in the world would put in a search criteria for that. But as my searching continued, perusing more in depth as to where they went on here, it showed that this faceless person hidden behind technical numbers and a far away screen pretty much read almost the entire thing in one sitting. That always makes me a little cautious that someone would read this thing that extensively. It would take hours!!! But then larger red flags flew highly as they came back the next day and actually searched the blog itself for these words....."paddle", "bend over", "hairbrush", "spoon" and "belt". Who does that crap???? And why????? What kind of a person goes looking for ways you discipline your children and gets off on it???? They then proceeded to read in that sitting what hadn't already been read the day before. I just don't understand that. It's enough to make me think twice about this whole thing and once again turn it into something that only my eyes see. Even if they were doing it in the name of "safety" for my children who in the world imposes it upon themselves to judge how I see fit to make my children behave? And when, oh when, did America go so far downhill that taking actions to have decently behaved children that are taught to act becomingly and properly, having established boundaries in life, turn into abuse???...if that's indeed what this person was seeking to believe. Either way, search words to that effect cannot be good....whether they find it arousing to prey on their perceived ideas of disciplinarians or they are reviewing my personal life searching for abuse problems in our family.

I suppose after it all passed they found nothing too amusing since they have no longer been back. But it was so alarming to me that I was tempted for more than a few days to once again be the soul eyes that see mine and Brad's personal journey through parenthood. After being so unnerved about it I finally settled down enough to hear the Lord speak. All He said to my palpatating heart was "Be still and know that I am God. If I am for you who can be against you? You shall not be ashamed when you speak with your enemies. You are a blessing and I have created you to be an example to the people I bring into your life." Once again peace fell over me and I began to pray.

I look at Boothe's blog and know that mine will probably never in a lifetime reach that depth or minister to anyone as her's as ministered to me. I know that my personally documented life is full of more comically minded mishaps of large families and ramblings of life with a bunch of kids than it ever is of Spiritual revelations that I receive or, even more so, dare impart to anyone else. But in my prayer I began to pray that whatever this person found that it would so minister to them that they would be captivated by the life we live. That they would no longer look at the world through their microscope in an attempt to set the world straight but begin to become fully aware of the encompassing power of our God, and the saving grace of the love of Jesus Christ. The same Jesus I am bringing my children up to know, respect and love with all of their heart, mind, soul and strength. For the 1st time in my writing I began to have a longing to reach people through this. When they are led here, for whatever reason it is that brings them here, that they are overcome with the Spirit of a living God. They would become so entrenched that they are not able to escape it and it would begin a voracious pursuit of God that they are completely unable to understand. I have begun to pray that they will never be satisfied until that void in their life is filled. Filled by the Holy Spirit. I hope that when people glimpse...or delve....into our life that it would be so captivating that it would truly be like reading a book that they are unable to put down. That our simple, mundane, around our house and town life would be so filled with adventure in our pursuit of following the Lord, as we attempt to live out the convictions that have been placed on our life, that it would minister to struggling parents and people in general, even if be only one or two in my lifetime of journaling our story. I hope that these searching people see our down to earth, very real, faltering attempts to raise our children. A task so monumental that we can only rely on the Lord to work in us and through us to accomplish the task He has given us in raising these children, these miraculous blessings in our lives.

Through this I cannot help but ponder how strangely we are all connected through a computer....many of these readers whom I have never met and will probably never meet......some that I have everything in common with and some that I have abslutely nothing in common with. I even have a beloved mother from Turkey and her friends who are now reading this crazy journey of our's. Sometimes a computer is just a strange foreign thing to me with a bunch of nameless, faceless people and sometimes it is just the coolest thing ever that it has the ability to unite so many likeminded people that are, in some form or fashion, also creating their own life story.