Feeling a Little Bit Pregnant

I've done amazingly well up until this point. In fact...so well, it almost raises fear. But within the last 3 or so days bouts of overwhelming nausea have become a very regular part of life and once nighttime rolls around it takes all of my willpower to hold anything down....which doesn't bode well for car travel. One that is not prone to car sickness can suddenly find themselves in the throws of pregnancy induced late night nausea coupled with extreme car sickness. Thankfully...we still had a good time, some meaningful conversation and no road side puking occurred.







Extreme exhaustion has also crept into life. I wake at 8, am capable of taking a 3 1/2 hr nap and fall asleep by 9. Not exactly a ton of entertainment or fun right now. Despite valiant efforts of staying awake at day's end gentle husband rubs head, bends down and kisses ear and neck, flashes a love smile and whispers almost every night, "Why don't you just quit fighting it and go to sleep, my lover girl. The day's over." And with big warm calloused hands woven through long strands of thick dark curls I fall to sleep, long before lights are turned out or house is shut down. I'm not entirely sure if it's due to the workload of the others or just merely pregnancy induced...or maybe a little of both. I'm thinking it's mostly pregnancy related due to the fact I was doing quite fine before sweet baby came into the picture.





Nausea continues to escalate and I am hopeful it has hit its peak for this pregnancy. As incapacitating as it can be it leaves me reassured that baby continues to grow. I would say due to the extent of it I am quite certain this might very well be a girl. But I was so entirely convinced of that last pregnancy only to be shocked by two boys that I don't think I'll go there in declaring my certainty of baby #11 undoubtedly being a girl. As of now, this will be our first surprise baby. We'll see if our resolve holds out. If it proves to do so 34 wks from now we'll all find out if baby is boy or girl.





Pregnancy confirmation appointment took place last Monday, in which I was congratulated and told "You are indeed very pregnant!" I found it a bit odd that after 10 children I was going in for a "pregnancy confirmation appt". Um....dear lady, I think I know when I am pregnant. We began the appt with them failing to review my chart before asking questions.







"Do you have any other children or is this your first baby?'


Yes, I have other children.




And you're around 23/24?




With a smile..."No. not exactly.




Oh??? Then your age?




35.




Oh wow! I wouldn't have known. So how many other children?




10.




2?




No. 10.




2, you say?




Ummm....no. Ten.




You have 10 other children???!!!


yes.


Do you mind me asking a very personal question?


Not at all.


Did you physically birth them all....or are any adopted?





And so it all went something like that. By the end of it they were all so thrilled for our family and so amazed by our outlook on it that they began asking questions of how we make it all work. She then eagerly reviewed chart, names and ages, asking questions of house size, daily routine and how we make it all work. They began the appt by stating there would be no sonogram before 12 weeks. With this new turn of events and their mounting excitement, the story changed and they were stating that they could do a sono in one week as soon as I hit 6 wks 1 day. I declined and stated my desire is to wait towards the end of the 1st trimester, since we have had one 2nd trimester loss. Since they only do one I don't want to risk doing it too early and then something happening later on. They were more than understanding and kind but their excitement still kept trying to convince having an earlier one done. I finally agreed to 11 wks instead of 12-13. They tried talking me into 8 but I couldn't bring myself to be ok with it. So, I have an ultrasound scheduled for August 16th as I near the end of the first trimester. And hopefully we will be welcomed with the sight of a big, growing, thriving baby with a strong heartbeat that we will have the amazing honor of bringing into this world about 34 wks from now.




So in love were the clinic employees that they asked if I could bring all 10 children to the u/s. They were filled with excitement over the possibility of meeting them and stated they would love the opportunity to show siblings their 1st glimpse of their new baby. The sonogram room is huge in size and they assured me it would easily accommodate the entire family. After some discussion with attentive husband, concerns were taken into consideration, it was decided the two of us will go in and take a look with the tech and, assuming all is indeed well with baby, children will be called in and be able to see their 12 wk old sibling. It's been years since I've had a sonogram done this early so seeing a baby so little is an exciting event around here.





I am grateful for the morning sickness and I embrace the exhaustion because I know that it means baby grows within and this pregnancy progresses. So, maybe a boost in iron intake and maybe some ginger capsules and I'm thinking I should be good to go for the next few weeks until the fun of the 1st trimester passes. How is it possible to be so in love with a baby that is merely the size of a grain of rice right about now? I love my life. I am overwhelmingly blessed by my husband and my children. The Lord has indeed been so very good to me. Thoughts of failure still loom somedays and fear of loss never truly fades into non existence but I embrace the present because I am here, I know how blessed I am and I refuse to ever take any of it for granted. I am absolutely overwhelmed and truly humbled beyond words by God's goodness. I will not gripe and I will not whine in the heat and when the exhaustion seems unbearable and when the waves of nausea roll over me because I know how blessed I am and how far the Lord has brought us.....from devastation to conquerors....and how abundantly we have been blessed in every area of our life.