(Forgot to add...just click on their name above to read their story)
There are no words to even come close to how heavy my heart is and how much it aches for this dear family. I have been following their story and am so grieved for them but so amazed by their walk. I have no doubt that I would've failed long ago if I had been called to walk this journey that they walk.
It has been a morning of sheer torture for now. Mostly because this family weighs so heavy on my heart. As I struggled and cried for this family this morning already making it a very tough morning, I had an allergy attack where I was seriously debating the need for an epi shot, downed 5 tsp of Benadryl, used my inhaler, Sudafed, Mucinex, and all of the other stuff on hand for when this occurs. In the midst of all of this taking place Tigger, our 80 pd German Shepherd, again got ahold of one of the baby goats, this time the smallest one, and there is no hope of her living. I do not have anything here to shoot her with to go ahead and put her down so I am waiting on Brad to get home as we try and make her as comfortable as possible until then. She is in one of our bathrooms in a laundry basket as I listen to her baby goat cries. I know there is absolutely nothing in the world that could even start to try and correlate this goat to this family's story but in my mind there is something that makes it all seem so real to me..........so very hard to watch something you love struggle so much. It is just a goat for us......but for this family the pain is so much more than inconceivable as they struggle with all of life and the understanding of pain watching their newborn baby girl try to live. I was already up many times throughout the night last night praying for and thinking about this family. Then having the goat to deal with this morning, as I watch her struggle to live and fight for each breath, reality sort of hit me about the incomprehensible journey this family has walked. The Lord has used our baby goat in a way to make real what seems like a story somewhere far away in the world. It may be crass to even dare compare the two but it has made this story so real to me. I cannot imagine their pain, their agony, as I gaze into my little Gavin's eyes and watch him smile and listen to him coo to me. As he nurses in his complete and total health I cry out at the uncertainty of life and what it is God seeks to do in a situation like this family is having to walk. There are no words ever to even come close. I know the Lord gives each person the grace to deal with whatever He has called you to walk but I don't know that I would've ever journeyed down the road they walk with as much grace, dignity, faith and trust in the Lord that they have exuded. Please pray for them today and in the days, and even years, following this time in their life as they struggle with turning over their newborn baby girl into the hands of the Lord. There truly are no words.
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