Missing Them

.......or.........maybe not. This was the the title of the entry I started last Th as Grayson, Evye, Aubrey, Garrison and Grant all left for Gary and Pam's, Brad's parents. But they came back a day earlier than expected, much to Brad's and my surprise, so here we are with them all home again only 3 days later. This was the 1st time Garrison and Grant have ever been very far away for an extended period and it tore my heart out to watch them leave. I finally decided I am either quite co-dependant on my children or completely over the top in love with them as I sat on the couch nursing Gavin and crying after they left. I kept thinking how ridiculous it was and how we could've kept them home with us and just taken them with us to FW on Friday. But, the fact they went was completely and totally for them since they were ecstatic and out of their minds as they begged and pleaded to go. They're old enough now that they long to keep up with everybody else and Garrison counted down the days with everyone else as their leaving day approached. It was me that had the hardest time with it. I sat in the silence after they all left..... that everybody says should be "me time" and a long awaited moment that was way too long in coming......and the house seemed so empty and desolate and so extremely quiet in its loneliness. So, unable to stand the serenity any longer I quickly dressed Garrett in some cute clothes, loaded an already ready Gavin up and the 3 of us left the eerily, all too quiet house. We drove up to the courthouse to see Mother and show off Gavin. At 5 she was off and the 4 of us headed into town since I told her I couldn't stand to go home to the emptiness. We had a ton of fun and ate a very slow leisurely dinner, in which I was quickly coming to reassess how much I really missed them and reevaluate my misery during the time I was given without all of the children. It's amazing how quickly loneliness and emptiness dissipates! Brad only worked the 1st 12 so he met us up there after he was relieved. After dinner Mother went home from there and the 2 of us looked at each other with only the 2 very younger ones in the back of his truck and debated on what to do. The emptiness was not long in returning for me and he began to experience it for the 1st time that day. Neither one of us could think of anything worthwhile to do, though we often talk and think of what fun it would be to be without the older ones for a date night. So, without much ado we turned the truck towards home and tucked the little ones in once there. The 2 of us just piled up in the bed and got comfy. You know you've been married way too long when you do actually get a date night and all you do is go home, put on jogging pants and lay around in comfort in the company of each other. So much for the hot, sexy, spice it up nights on the town! But both of us agree that we love where we are and the ability to just rest in the enjoyment of each other.......no matter what we do. We both decided years ago that it's a lot more fun to do oven pizza, rent a movie and lay around in whatever we want to enjoying the ability to pause it for a bathroom or popcorn break whenever we want to. I love being home.


This is what Garrett managed to accomplish while the older ones were gone.



So, Friday we were out of the house and on our way to Fort Worth by 9 am. We were on time despite the early departure with the 2 smaller ones in tow. Granny met us over there and was able to see and hold Gavin for the 1st time. It worked out so well and the Lord truly knows every need before it ever arises. She was there to take Garrett and walk him around while Gavin was circumcised. We definitely didn't plan it that way but after having to wait for an hour and a half and then finally getting Gavin in to be seen Garrett was a little tired of being cooped up in a little tiny waiting room. We were supposed to meet up with Kenny and Kelly but that got screwed up due to Kenny being on a transfer to Plano so, once again, we turned the truck towards home and made our 4 hr way back.



But, the older 5 returned home yesterday so we are back together and getting settled once more into our daily routines. I'm so glad to have them all home.



And on another note....seeing as how I was a huge beached whale 3 short weeks ago now I just look like a huge whale that gave birth 3 wks ago. I think I may just be the 1st cow to ever give birth to a human! LOL! I can laugh only because I know of my devout determination to get it all off once again. But on the really great side of it.......I am down to only 12 more pds to go before getting back to prepregnancy weight. Granted, I had 20 pds to lose before that. So, I now have 32 pds to lose. It sounds like a ton but on average after every pregnancy I have about 15 to lose and always...well, obviously NOT always......drop it all with WW. Garrett's pregnancy was the only one I haven't lost all of the weight before getting pregnant again.....maybe perhaps because he was only 3 days old when I freakin showed up pregnant again????!!!!! Well, alright.....5 months old...but close enough. So, I have the official ok to go ahead and start losing it. I can hardly wait! I have to wait until Gavin's 4 wks old to start any intense walking routine (which is just fine with me since I'm not yet in the mood to go chatting with the rattlesnakes in the quiet of the day on our unpaved streets) or working out but I can go ahead and start dropping the weight and following WW. So, I'm starting all of that tomorrow. I was going to wait until the 1st, Wed, but I figured every little day helps so I figure I'll just begin tomorrow. That'll give me time to get it all organized tonight and get in mind what I need to grocery shop for and get it all lined up to get it going. At least this way if I show up pregnant again in another 5 months I will at least be back down to my normal weight and have enjoyed some skinny time.......even if it's only for 2 or 3 months! I plan on tracking it with pictures too so I'll post some before pics tomorrow.